10). The Xmas and fireworks bills just arrived. — SteveinOZ, Tom Lafleur and Sir Bob

9). We're getting directions on how to use typewriters, pencils, file cards and Etch-a-Sketches in the event of Y2K computer failure  THROUGH E-MAIL. — R. Dorgan

8). Publishers Clearing House is still giving you one last chance to enter... at least once a week. — Wanda Elder

7). There are purists who still contend it wasn't REALLY the end of the millennium anyway. — anna

6). My neighbour was knocking at my bomb shelter door wanting to borrow my snow blower. — Mike Lafleur

5). Your mother-in-law has just arrived to stay for the week! And/Or: Your son-in law is working. — Anatole I. Karmen and Steve

4). The groundhog lost his unemployment case. — josh

3). I woke up early New Year's morning and learned it wasn't a nightmare: I really am stuck in New Jersey. — pineland

2). Reruns, reruns, reruns. — Gam

1). Well, DUH! — Deerfeather